you know when you go out of your way to please some one and its not good enough?
have a man but its liek iam standing alone and he lets me know iam standing alone,
r needs paid for
and that he will just pay for what ever has to be paid for..
iam stress can i bet i cant rest
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Saturday, March 6, 2010
being a mother
i need to get this off my chest,
some thing that bothers me every day,
why did i give my kids way?
i had no one to help me no one to trun to, after the fire i didnt know what to do,
that fire showed me i have no one and i am utterly alone
i want my babies with me but thats only a dream..
i think everyday what if i had them where would i be now?
am i a bad person?
i look at my self and think HELL FUCK YEAH ! U LEFT UR KIDS BEHIND!
no one understands why, cuz i dont nether,
every one thought i was out having fun but a man took so much controle over me i didnt care, i gave up on my self!
that was the first time i couldnt hold my own,
b4 my babies i was this rugged bad ass bytch not giving a shyt about my own life nore others, if i seen my self walkin down the street i wouldnt give m self eye contact...
i didnt things to get that i want, i sold dope @ 14 and walked around like i was the queen!
robbed, beat up people stabbed people, for the fact that for me then it was fun.
i didnt go to school i didnt care, let alone my mother didnt care nether at least welfare was giving her money for me, nore did she buy me cloths or feed me right.. didnt have to go to school.. all i had was the street,, the hard cold cement was the onlhy thing that could hold me down ...
now iam 28 not 8 no more iam a mother that fucked up big time, still them kids are mine!
regarless as any one says i am there mother!
i am a good person now, i care about others, i care, i love, i protect!
iam germaine and no one out there can say the same
some thing that bothers me every day,
why did i give my kids way?
i had no one to help me no one to trun to, after the fire i didnt know what to do,
that fire showed me i have no one and i am utterly alone
i want my babies with me but thats only a dream..
i think everyday what if i had them where would i be now?
am i a bad person?
i look at my self and think HELL FUCK YEAH ! U LEFT UR KIDS BEHIND!
no one understands why, cuz i dont nether,
every one thought i was out having fun but a man took so much controle over me i didnt care, i gave up on my self!
that was the first time i couldnt hold my own,
b4 my babies i was this rugged bad ass bytch not giving a shyt about my own life nore others, if i seen my self walkin down the street i wouldnt give m self eye contact...
i didnt things to get that i want, i sold dope @ 14 and walked around like i was the queen!
robbed, beat up people stabbed people, for the fact that for me then it was fun.
i didnt go to school i didnt care, let alone my mother didnt care nether at least welfare was giving her money for me, nore did she buy me cloths or feed me right.. didnt have to go to school.. all i had was the street,, the hard cold cement was the onlhy thing that could hold me down ...
now iam 28 not 8 no more iam a mother that fucked up big time, still them kids are mine!
regarless as any one says i am there mother!
i am a good person now, i care about others, i care, i love, i protect!
iam germaine and no one out there can say the same
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
why do i let him steal my mind?
i have a open door for him to walk right in my mind..
and let him walk around as he please,
his personal is what makes me so interested in his soul his mind...
but i love my man i love my family
its fucked up..
iam guess iam that much of a attention whore...
but i LOVE NY MEN!
i have a open door for him to walk right in my mind..
and let him walk around as he please,
his personal is what makes me so interested in his soul his mind...
but i love my man i love my family
its fucked up..
iam guess iam that much of a attention whore...
but i LOVE NY MEN!
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